I haven’t done an update on our DRF lately.
You see, I have been really busy, giving myself a lot of pep talks.
Sometimes those little talks work and sometimes they don’t.
So friend, do me a favor. Call me a Wambulance, pull up a chair, and I will tell you all about it, while we wait for the Wambulance to come pick me up.
Here are just a few of the modern conveniences, that I have taken for granted wayyyyyyyy too long, in no particular order:
Heat. (We do have three space heaters now and that has taken the chill out of the floor and we no longer have to move the one heater around to different rooms at least.)
Having a kitchen sink. Here is the dishwashing process that
we I go through.
Rinse (yep, we rinse in the shower…there are cracks in the rubbermaid container for drainage…brilliant, I know).
Dry. So you can see why paper plates and plasticware is our preferred method of serving these days.
A stove. Lawd, do I miss having a stove. (Baking! OMGee, I can’t wait! Spoiler: you are all getting baked goods for Christmas! I can smell the molasses cookies already.)
My bathroom. I miss having a shower that doesn’t need plunging. Let me just clarify, that shower is clean. Those layers are from all the years of discoloration and hard water. And we do wear shower shoes, although at this point, I have no idea if it helps.
And oh how I miss a toilet that doesn’t require any “double flushes” (I just made that term up, but you get the point).
A washer and dryer. Even though I am pleasantly surprised that I don’t really mind going to the laundromat, I still miss my Speed Queens. But the laundromat does provide a respite. I can sit and read — which is heavenly. I may have even — on occasion — inserted an extra quarter or two, just to
make sure I got all the dampness out of the load read a few more chapters.
A home without squirrels living in the walls. This is a tough one. It is hard for me to find joy when said critter is climbing the bedroom walls at 3 a.m. But I am trying. (Yes, we have traps in the attic. But those critters are smart. Free-loading peanut butter eaters.)
Carpet, preferably the clean kind. Oh my gosh… Do me a favor. Walk barefoot in your home. Spread your toes and rake them through whatever kind of pile your carpet has. Ahh. Do that for me. Take a picture and text it to me, would ya? Let me share in your carpet joy…for real. Send me a pic and I will find out who my real friends are.
Kitchen counters. There are reasons why counters come in standard heights so you are not constantly leaning over a table to do prep work.
More than one working outlet in the room. Not having to unplug the space heater any time you want to use the microwave.
Doors, driveways, and access points. Think about needing something in your attached garage, and having to walk out the opposite side of your house, walk all the way around the house, and enter via an actual garage door, to retrieve said item…and then walk back around again to get back in. Or you can walk down the old cellar stairs, across the new basement and up the new basement stairs. So do you get what I am trying to say? Now do that 20-30 times a day. Where is a Fitbit when I need one?
So, on the upside. I am trying. I am trying to find joy in this process.
I am grateful for the little reminders that even the coffee cup is shouting at me.
We don’t drink out of real mugs right now — just more to have to wash — and use styrofoam cups. But BJR used this to melt butter. And I can’t tell you how glad I am that he did. I need these reminders right now. It really made me smile.
I am tired and not feeling good but I still know that joy is a choice.
When RA is flaring, the amount of energy needed for the physical battle drains the emotional energy as well. And it just makes the little things all that much harder to accomplish. Not impossible, but harder. I don’t even like to say the “f-word” — flaring. Saying it means I have to acknowledge it. Sometimes I try to operate as a deer in headlights when I am flaring — just stay focused on the brightness. Get stuck in the warm glow and ignore the darkness and discomfort. Sometimes that is okay. Sometimes it doesn’t work. With over 30 years of autoimmune diseases under my belt, I have traveled this road before. I have to glean my mind — and my heart — for all the mental strength I can muster and keep going.
I have never flared before while indoor camping. And BJR is just so, so darn manly about it. I don’t think he minds this indoor camping one bit! And all I want are the comforts of home right now. But then again, BJR has survived invading Panama, training in everything from the jungles of Thailand to the tundra of Alaska, plus four deployments to Iraq and Afghanistan. He thinks our DRF is the equivalent to the Hilton — bless his heart.
I know there is still plenty of joy to be found, even in the midst of my pity party.
The sun is shining today.
I have a hard-working husband who would do anything for me. (Well, anything except park his Harley in the outbuilding during the winter — more on that subject below.) But he would do anything real for me.
I have a beautiful family that keeps growing…talk about blessed. I am a Grammy!
I have a roof over my head, albeit a cold one.
We are starting the next chapter of our lives as empty nesters, living out a dream, restoring this beautiful primitive Dirt Road Farm.
I have this beautiful quote (look Julia, I saved it!) and it’s taped on the back of my iPad.
I think it applies to so many of us, whatever our battle may be.
Maybe we overextend ourselves and do too much.
Or maybe we are fighting a tremendous specific battle.
With all my frustrations about construction delays and indoor camping, and the f-word, I am reminded of Mother Theresa’s wisdom. “I know God doesn’t give me more than I can handle. I just wish He didn’t trust me so much.”
A Problem Halved
While suffering is universal, how we react to it is uniquely individual. It can strengthen us or tear us apart. The stress and the heartaches can be lessened when we share them with friends. Like I just did.
Cancel that emergency call for a Wambulance. I am feeling better already. Thank you, so very much, dear friend.
Enough about that… Let’s talk new addition!
We did get the last exterior door in this week … and that was pretty darn exciting!
If you look closing at that door, you will see it is SUPER wide. I have been hearing BJR say he wanted an extra wide service door so he could bring the Harley through it. I have been hearing him say that for YEARS…need a wide door for the Harley to fit through. Yep, okay, wide door for the bike to fit through it.
However…as we were driving home the other day, and talking about said extra-wide service door, and about the Harley going through it, I had one of those darn ‘ah-ha’ light bulb moments.
He was saying that — for the last five plus years — so he could bring the Harley in the garage, aka our living room, while we are living in it.
Picture us driving down the road, happy and in love, and enjoying the heated truck…when I connected the dots.
Talk about having heard something repeatedly yet still not comprehending it.
Insert several moments of shock and disbelief on my part, along with nervous laughter. The motorcycle in our living room? Really? Where I was planning on putting our kitchen table?
I finally asked, can I put cute little LED lights around it and make it part of the decor at least? Hmm…
Marriage is a balance of compromise.
Marriage is a balance of compromise.
Marriage is a balance of compromise.
I say that three times for my own understanding, not yours.
Apparently, some people have done this. Used motorcycles as part of their decor.
I’m glad for them. That’s why there is chocolate and vanilla. But oy. Gotta really stretch myself for this idea.
However…because I am working on finding the joy in everything — that extra-wide service door being installed, means that we can finally close up the house!
We finally got to install one of our new doorknobs. The door will be painted as soon as weather permits. (So maybe March?!)
And, when we can close up the house, and the drywall is done, we can break on through to the other side… and that is super exciting!
There is some joy! And we won’t have to muck-march around the house anymore.
Which in turn means that means we will have successfully bridged the 1880s farmhouse with the 2017 addition. Whoop whoop!
And that makes me happy. Very very happy. Happy dance kinda happy!
Big love from our muddy DRF…may you find joy in the journey today, no matter the circumstances.
Please know I remain devoted to the “Glass Half Full” club but am equally devoted to “keeping it real” — I don’t want to just report about rainbows and unicorns from the farm. Because sometimes real is hard. For me, that time is now. But tomorrow morning the sun is coming up!
May God give you the grace and grit to keep walking,
one foot in front of the other no matter how impossible the mountain feels to climb.
May He lead you by streams of living water, refresh your weary soul,
and give you just what you need at every twist and turn.
May He take your burdens and give you a new song to sing.
May He renew your faith to believe that fresh blessings await you just around the bend.
And tomorrow when the sun comes up, may His new morning mercies feel as miraculous as they are.